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The Christmas Story As It Unfolded on Facebook

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'Tis that time of the year to tell the Christmas story all over again.

A young virgin teenager is visited by a super-angel and told she's gonna be a baby-mama. Next minute, she's preggers. Her child is Jesus and He's gonna change the whole ball-game. Her fiancé finds out, but is super-chill because an angel shows up in his dream and tells him God's got this! 9 months later, they can't find a decent motel to give birth, so they crash in a one-star manger. Shepherds and wise men bring gifts. Herod gets mad and kills lots of babies. God protects and sends the couple off to Egypt. Herod dies an ugly death. Happy couple returns to Nazareth and do their best to live happily ever after. 

I probably missed a few details, but you get the gist.

You know what I was thinking this year, though? I was wondering how this advent narrative would have unfolded if Joseph and Mary had access to social media? What would their Facebook and hashtag-infused conversations have sounded like?

Wonder no more! 

I present you the Christmas story, as it unfolded on Facebook!


1. That time when Mary's relatives, Zechariah and Elizabeth were totally NOT prepared, BUT TOTALLY GRATEFUL to have their world rocked by a a pregnancy in their old age. 

2. That time when Joseph really REALLY wanted to know and connect with his family roots. 

3. That time after Mary got engaged to Joseph and was TOTALLY FOCUSED ON PLANNING HER WEDDING. 

4. That time when the shepherds thought they were high and were seeing things, but they weren't really high and really saw things!

5. That time the innkeeper didn't know that the couple he sent to the back room were actually the most important guests he would ever receive in his inn. 

6. That time the morning after when Mary held in her hands God Himself.

7. That time when the Magi rolled into town like WHAT! 

8. That time when good ole' old-timer, Simeon saw Jesus and got his release papers. 

9. That time when Herod went ballistic and God sent an angel to give Joseph and Mary a heads up.

10. That time 12 years later when Jesus was all like, "You ain't my mama, Mary. God is my daddy!" And Mary was all like, "Oh boy, I knew this day would come."

And there you have it! 

Merry Christmas everyone! :)